Never Be Complacent Because You Are Afraid

Hi :)

I know I need to get back on here and write another blog when my facebook posts start getting longer and longer...The proof is in the pudding, I guess I have been feeling inspired lately.

So usually, when I DO write on here, I come with a rampant mission of topics to discuss, but today I'm just going to go with the flow.  I know I have a whole lot of things I could talk about, we'll see where my brain takes me.


Usually what starts me is things I am learning in my own life, so we'll start there.  What is the biggest thing I am learning lately?

I am not going to get a damn thing in my life/job unless I not only ask for it, but demand it, remind the people I'm asking, keep showing how great I am at whatever I'm doing, and don't back down.  The things I want are NOT going to be handed to me.  They are going to be given to the person who is demanding harder than I am.

There isn't going to be a change in my life unless I make it.  Life ain't no Cinderella story.  If I want something different, I have to earn it.  It's very annoying, but I'm pretty sure it's like this for most people.

There's always going to be more people who disagree with me or just don't understand me than people who are going to be on my side.  But that doesn't mean I'm wrong.  In fact most of the time, when I do have a conversation with people, they're either very impressed with what I have to say, or they're belligerent and their counterpoints, are so stupid that they only encourage me.  And sometimes, I am just plain wrong.  But being wrong about a couple things doesn't make you wrong about everything.  I think people are afraid to speak out because they are afraid of being wrong.  I love being wrong because it teaches me new things--I want to get my words as far out as possible because often, I am very wise and I think I can help people--and when I am wrong, I'm helping myself by learning.  I don't claim to know it all by speaking out about things that I have a solid logical argument behind.  I do claim to be proud of my own opinions, and I think that's important as long as you are using logic and self-improvement as your motivation, and not selfish reasons.

My life is just always going to be hard.  It's never been easy, it never will be easy.  All I can do now is laugh and realize that it is what I make of it.  I can act like everything's so horrible or really, I can appreciate the blessings I do have.  And sometimes, I can flamboyantly express the 'suckery' of it all, because every one of us is entitled to do that a few times a week.  But, at the same point, I'm not going to make a big deal out of small things by letting them take over my life.  Self-expression and depression are two different things.  Leading me to my next point--

People will always make a big deal out of little things.  Often, as a consequence, this blurs what the actual truth is for people who are just listening in on a conversation, and can cause the weak-minded to see things unclearly, which is why you must always try to listen to things objectively and form your own conclusions.  For instance, when I listen to someone vent about the behavior of someone else.  I can objectively watch this and, while, maybe I don't approve of the behavior of the person who is the subject of the discussion, in the same token, often this would never bother me enough to say anything about it.  To me it's like, you're behaving poorly and you need to improve--but unless you are TRULY hurting others, it's really not something for other people to get all fussy about.  And at my work, watching people get upset because things were left in places where they don't go--that's just hilarious.  It's amazing how things that don't matter can get blown out of proportion by the right people.  Or even when I'm bothered by something.  I've literally had to vocalize--"Hey--it bothers me, but it's not a big deal," because the person I was telling this to was acting like it was horrible that something small and trivial was bothering me (it was loud yelling at a football game, fyi).  When I told this person, who I love dearly that, they were simply like, "Oh," with an -oops- look on their face.  I just plugged my ears, grimaced, and moved on with my life.  Lol.

The title of my book will be, "Dear People, I May Be Annoyed But My Life Didn't End Because Someone Put Eggs In My Frittata."
Life is what it is and you get what you get, you're annoyed by what you're annoyed by, you don't like what you don't like, you go through what you go through and it's NOT a big deal.  Unless you make it that.

When I read over this, it's clear that the main focus of my life is not anything we're taught to focus on--it's self-improvement and the pure happiness that comes with that.  Push others and push yourself ONLY where it counts, and don't cause yourself anxiety by worrying about things that don't matter.  Speak your mind, learn, and you may be surprised by how right you are and how wrong other people are.  And if you are wrong, you may be surprised by how much you've learned and how glad you are for saying the wrong thing--because without doing that, you would never have been taught something new.  Live your life, say what you need to say.  Go where you need to go.  Never be complacent because you are afraid.

You Could Analyze Something To Death

September 8th??  September 8th was REALLY the last time I blogged?!  So it's been 3 weeks.  Time really, really flies guys.  It doesn't matter what I am doing.  I just feel like I'm going to be 100 tomorrow.  I thought I'd blogged last a week ago!!  Are you the same?  I remember, as a kid, time used to feel like waiting for a turtle to lick up a puddle of molasses... Now I savor every moment because I feel they are disappearing like tiny grains of surface sand on a windy day.  And maybe that's the point of this blog in a way... to focus on what's big to you, because the little disappears.

Was doing some research for my other blog, and was inspired by gradients.  When one color fades into a different color, so seamlessly it almost looks like the two could be one uniform shade.  And they could, if you backed away far enough.
I wanted to compare how an artist's gradient looked from farther away to how it looked very close up, and when I saw the close-up, it occurred to me I could see the lines of blending.  It did not look seamless.  But then it occurred to me, if I could fix the imperfections and unblended lines at the close-up, and was able to get an even larger close-up of the corrected close-up, you would still see more lines of blending.  No matter how much you, "fix," something, the closer you get to it, the more imperfections you will see, down to the microscopic level.  Until you can get to the tiniest point of existence, perfection does not exist.

So, you could spend a life-time trying your darndest to get the most, "perfect," thing, look the most, "perfect," way...Please notice, I often quote (or sometimes first-letter-capitalize) the words I don't stand by.
And when you had that perfect mesh of what you believe you're supposed to have, that gradient that may as well be one object, what have you?

Well, you have something that looks very nice.

Whether it holds moral value to you is another subject entirely.

Everything you work for, everything you do, none of it truly matters--unless it has moral value to you.  Everything aside from love and happiness are just extras in your life.  And when we keep trying to fix small things, we often are, point-blank, wasting our time.  We, for some reason, are very good at blowing tiny interactions, tiny choices, tiny situations, completely out of proportion.  And because we are giving that petty list of things meaning, whatever the list and whatever the meanings are, we focus on them and forget about what will truly fulfill us.

So when I say, "You Could Analyze Something To Death," in the blog-title, I mean it heartily.  You could analyze all the tiny things that you feel need tweaked until finally, you have no more time left.  In the end, will you appreciate the product of your work more than the experiences that it took to get you to that finished product?

Whether you are at a company balancing moral and sales, or at home balancing your life, this applies to you.  People in your life will always tell you at certain points in the path, that something needs to be tweaked.  You have to make the changes on it that are worthwhile to you.  What will you be proud of more?  How something looks, or the love and happiness you gave to get yourself there?



PS: This blog is my darling.  I love writing in here, and I don't plan to stop making posts.  I'll write in here at least once a month, if not more.  Also, please feel free to ask me questions and give suggestions for topics you'd like me to discuss. :)

You're Not Normal, Thank God, So Quit Trying To Act Like It

I can totally relate to people who feel strange and different from everyone else.

I think you can too.  Can't admit it?

You have never had times where you felt like you were the only person who felt a certain way about something?  Like no one else who you were talking to could relate to it?

You never had a time in your life where what you wanted wasn't what everyone around you wanted?  Whether it be out of you or whether it be something that a lot of people want (Like children?  A certain career motive?  College?  Or a puppy?  Or even chocolate?  *Gasps*)?

Ever laughed at something that nobody else in the room thought was funny?

Or getting down to basics, there isn't some strange food combination that you really like, that nobody else would dare eat?

No??  Goodness, you are really boring......


I know I HAVE felt this way, and may I say I am a little proud of it?

No, I'm actually a LOT proud of it.  And you should be too.  That's the stuff that makes you interesting.  The stuff that people don't expect.

There's nobody I love more than the so-called, "strange," ones.  The ones who feel like they don't fit in.

The ones who, in actuality, aren't afraid to behave completely normal.  The real normal.  The one that is human, has emotions, and isn't afraid to express themselves instead of repress themselves to fit into a man-made category that our ancestors have been imposing on us for hundreds, if not thousands of years.

You see, normalcy is something that we often expect, but we never actually know.  It's phony.  It's not real.  And the unhappiest people of all are those who try to be it--because they consistently fail--and/or--they constantly expect it out of other people, judging them, and generally living a miserable existence full of negativity and hypocrisy.


In my book...you can be happy...or you can be, "normal."

Go live your life!!!!!  Parachute or something... Laugh your ass off at something no one else in the room will.  You only live once.  Live well.  Don't put yourself in a box because you are afraid.  You'll only trap yourself.

*Laughs*...Sigh...ohhh... "Normal."
It's so overrated.

Have fun :)

It's Okay To Ride Up To A Dead End...

There might be a beautiful sunset there.

Or there may not be.  It's still perfectly okay.

I like to go on bike rides in the evening sometimes when the sun is setting.  I'll ride as far away as I can from the sun, maybe 20-40 minutes before the sun sets, and then, when I see it start to set, as fast as I can, I ride my bike to the closest view possible of the sunset.  It's my time to look at everything around me, feel everything around me, and take nothing for granted.  It's also exhilarating!

Today when I was doing this, I noticed something about myself.  I got nervous every time I got close to a dead end.  Worried, that because I didn't know if there would be another road around the corner, that people might laugh at my bad directional skills.

How silly this is, yet I've clearly been trained to do this.  We all do this at points in our lives.  We don't want to be seen doing something that might look foolish, when actually, what we should feel foolish about--is the fact that we feel foolish to begin with about whatever we are doing.  Would you feel foolish doing it if you were on your own and no one else knew about it?  There comes a point where you have to realize that it doesn't MATTER what people think.  Do what makes you happy.  So many of us choose to go the safe route.  The one where we know people will not judge us.  This is often at the sacrifice of our own happiness.  Why miss out on the things that we enjoy simply because other people, usually ignorant of our intentions and quick to judge, waste their time making uninformed conclusions about us (instead of focusing on what is actually important in life--even more of a reason to not care about what those people think).  As long as we aren't harming others, it really doesn't matter one flip what others have to say about what we are doing.

The most adventurous path, the path that is right for you, is not always on the road where people travel.  You might end up in a valley staring at the sky for a while.  Or you might end up lost, or working really hard to find yourself in a better place.  Or you may take a wrong turn at a dead end.  But the last thing you should be doing is worrying what others think about it.  Make the life choices, and the little choices, that are going to make you the most happy.  You cannot base these off of what other people think of you without sacrificing some happiness along the way.  The biggest regrets are lost chances.  Do you truly regret that you chose not to achieve something you did not want to do just because other people wanted you to?  Priorities need to be rearranged... YOUR life is about YOUR happiness.  Not others.  Things you could have done to improve your life--for YOU--that you missed out on, should be your only regrets, if any.  So go for it!!

(Of course, please try to be conscious and help animals, the world, and humanity while you are at it.  Little choices count.)