Loss

Loss is a life lesson that we all eventually go through.  It's difficult to address loss, and--obviously--is a commonly avoided subject.  The idea of losing loved ones, or even losing acquaintances, can seem unfathomable, at least until death happens.  And then it does and it's a slap in the face.  The wondering--what you could have done--and you suffer loss, not only for the person, but for all the time you could have spent with them.  Then on top of that, you also realize things that you never thought you'd realize, like, how silly you were for having any judgments of that person, how wrong you were for thinking things about them that absolutely should have no bearing on the goodness of their soul.  Anything stupid that you may have thought about that person suddenly appears, even if it might not have been as big of a deal as what you are making it now. Left raw, open, and exposed, for you to clean up like dust underneath a shelf that got moved to another part of the room.  But you realize most of your initial worries after losing a loved one were silliness, the product of the anxiety and grief such an event can create.  And, sometimes they aren't.  In any case, we all must find our own way to move on, and like everything else in life, no two paths are the same.

Each person we meet has a clock with a timer on it, and we don't know what day that timer is going to stop.  Appreciate the fact that they are around, give them a smile, give them encouragement, because we have no idea what they are going through or if/when we will see them again.  We all experience pain.  We are never ever alone in our pain, and in fact, we are just as alone in our happiness, yet we feel as if we are alone in our pain because most of us are too afraid to share it.  It's still a cultural taboo we need to overcome.  A taboo that, if overcame, would benefit a lot of people who feel unnecessarily isolated.  Unhappiness is the nature of living in a world full of expectations, human rights issues, unpredictability and instability.  Happiness is the ability to see past all that, the ability to get yourself out of situations that aren't good for you, and to not take what is truly meaningful and right in front of us for granted.  That includes not taking for granted the people around us, the ones we love and the ones we hardly know, with the knowledge that life is short.

Furthering on happiness, as it is a very relevant topic when we discuss death, mostly for the people who have to recover from their loss of a loved one, but also in situations where someone has passed before their time--We all deserve to be happy.  But it isn't handed to us on a silver platter.  Tragedy is inevitable for everyone.  Happy things are also inevitable for everyone, but we have to take the time to appreciate them.  Wealthy or poor, in sickness or in health, happiness is absolutely something every person on earth must work for.  It's earned like wages.  And often, you've got to wade through a bunch of crap in order to get to it, but it's always worth it.

I have been shocked by death of an acquaintance who I thought was an incredibly happy, wonderful light in this world.  We never know what is going on in people's lives, and often their behavior shows no reflection of the truth.  Some people show their emotions, some are talented at hiding them.  A happy person's mental state and/or personal lives could be falling apart just as much as someone who is unhappy.  Someone who has the popular 'goal lifestyle' could be miserable, someone with an unpopular, even difficult way of living could be absolutely thrilled.  Things are not always as they seem.  We all take joy from different things.  This is why more than ever, we should value making people around us feel good, even if they are not behaving the most kindly.  You have no idea what's going on behind closed doors, no idea how the way you treat them could affect the quality of their day, affect their choices, affect positive outcomes.  And while in all likelihood, your words as a stranger will be forgotten, it does not hurt to try to be positive at the right times.  Respect is a right for every creature in this world.

Appreciate the beauty of truly kind people.  Embrace and encourage other people's happiness.   You never know when your opportunity to do that will be gone.  Life goes by incredibly fast.  Relish it, make it a priority to have your moments with people.  You never know when someone is going to be gone and you can't put a smile on their face anymore.  You never know how something little you do could change someone's life.  Just some thoughts!! :)  I think we all get too wrapped up in the little and forget to focus on the big, even if we've thought to before, there's just a lot of crap to wade through and distract us!! ;)

Take care guys :)
--L

PS:  I think the only time I mention I love songs on here, they're probably by Coldplay...but I really like their new song called Hymn For The Weekend.  It's beautiful!!!

You Could Analyze Something To Death

September 8th??  September 8th was REALLY the last time I blogged?!  So it's been 3 weeks.  Time really, really flies guys.  It doesn't matter what I am doing.  I just feel like I'm going to be 100 tomorrow.  I thought I'd blogged last a week ago!!  Are you the same?  I remember, as a kid, time used to feel like waiting for a turtle to lick up a puddle of molasses... Now I savor every moment because I feel they are disappearing like tiny grains of surface sand on a windy day.  And maybe that's the point of this blog in a way... to focus on what's big to you, because the little disappears.

Was doing some research for my other blog, and was inspired by gradients.  When one color fades into a different color, so seamlessly it almost looks like the two could be one uniform shade.  And they could, if you backed away far enough.
I wanted to compare how an artist's gradient looked from farther away to how it looked very close up, and when I saw the close-up, it occurred to me I could see the lines of blending.  It did not look seamless.  But then it occurred to me, if I could fix the imperfections and unblended lines at the close-up, and was able to get an even larger close-up of the corrected close-up, you would still see more lines of blending.  No matter how much you, "fix," something, the closer you get to it, the more imperfections you will see, down to the microscopic level.  Until you can get to the tiniest point of existence, perfection does not exist.

So, you could spend a life-time trying your darndest to get the most, "perfect," thing, look the most, "perfect," way...Please notice, I often quote (or sometimes first-letter-capitalize) the words I don't stand by.
And when you had that perfect mesh of what you believe you're supposed to have, that gradient that may as well be one object, what have you?

Well, you have something that looks very nice.

Whether it holds moral value to you is another subject entirely.

Everything you work for, everything you do, none of it truly matters--unless it has moral value to you.  Everything aside from love and happiness are just extras in your life.  And when we keep trying to fix small things, we often are, point-blank, wasting our time.  We, for some reason, are very good at blowing tiny interactions, tiny choices, tiny situations, completely out of proportion.  And because we are giving that petty list of things meaning, whatever the list and whatever the meanings are, we focus on them and forget about what will truly fulfill us.

So when I say, "You Could Analyze Something To Death," in the blog-title, I mean it heartily.  You could analyze all the tiny things that you feel need tweaked until finally, you have no more time left.  In the end, will you appreciate the product of your work more than the experiences that it took to get you to that finished product?

Whether you are at a company balancing moral and sales, or at home balancing your life, this applies to you.  People in your life will always tell you at certain points in the path, that something needs to be tweaked.  You have to make the changes on it that are worthwhile to you.  What will you be proud of more?  How something looks, or the love and happiness you gave to get yourself there?



PS: This blog is my darling.  I love writing in here, and I don't plan to stop making posts.  I'll write in here at least once a month, if not more.  Also, please feel free to ask me questions and give suggestions for topics you'd like me to discuss. :)